People have asked me how the kids are doing. They are doing amazingly well. Amazingly well considering the complete upheaval their lives have taken this year. They have their mommy and daddy back under one roof. What is happening under that roof is stressful. There are painters, carpet layers, cleaners, landscapers; all making their house into a different house. All of their worldly belongings have been hauled off to a storage locker in the name of "staging" this house.
The realtor comes this afternoon to put the house on the market. If we are lucky it will sell fast. The house we bought didn't pass the building inspection and so we had to let it go. We were all so sad about that. We pictured ourselves in that house, had picked out bedrooms and planned where furniture would go. We saw a vision of a happy future there. It was just another harsh reality for them that, sometimes, no matter how hard you wish for it, the future is uncertain.
They just want some certainty. We all do.
Shane wants a promise that i will always be here, i will always walk hand in hand beside him. I want that too. But, one can't predict all the twists and turns life may take.
Tonight i am going to see my very favourite band in the world. Band of Horses have been the soundtrack that plays in my head for the past year. When i was struggling to regain mental clarity, to give up psychiatric medications, to not be sad all the time - Band of Horses was the music i played over and over in my head as i fought to place one foot in front of the other. Plus, if i was allowed to have a "list" the singer would take spots one through five.
Posted by Jess at 09:32 AM Permalink
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Have a great time at Band of Horses. I love them dearly, the record of my spring, for sure. My sister saw them in Atlanta and had rave reveiws. Also delurking to say how happy I am for your family. Somehow it seemed in the cards. Kudos for being so brave about getting back to it- that would scare me shitless.
Posted by ellen | August 27, 2008 05:59 PM