life can always start out anew

Last night we made homemade ice cream. A vanilla bean and oreo cookie concoction. We had so much fun watching the progress. Turning the paddle in the ice cream every five minutes, watching the gooey mess slowly take shape. We dug in right out of the ice cream maker.

The kids are doing well. We are doing well. I have been trying to find more fun things for us to do. As i have the kids during the week most of our time is taken up with school and activities and homework. But, i really want to make their time with me about other stuff too. These are the times i have this inkling desire to homeschool, just so we could spend more time together. Of course, that's just crazy talk as i would surely lose my mind in a matter of days.

I find the nights when i have the kids incredibly lonely. They go to bed fairly early. And then i just sort of putter around. I have no interest in television anymore and often i have trouble reading at night as i am just a little too tired. I end up browsing blogs, sitting staring at the fire, wandering around outside my house admiring the stars and the moons reflection off the lake. Listening to my melancholy music.

It's hard in the still darkness of the night to keep my mind from dark places. Keep focused on the positive things. Last night i posted on facebook that i was feeling lonely and a friend sent me this quote:

“Language... has created the word "loneliness" to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word "solitude" to express the glory of being alone.” ~someone