empty swing

Jess.....

DO not ever under estimate the quality and wonder of Simple....my four kids knew it first hand and at one time *I* felt like I was such a lacking mom....and yet as they grow and mature, Kyke is 20!!!! oh DEAR 20 :) AND doing so so well. I remember him being 10 and his dad left he and the three other kids and me and it was our first Christmas and him in HOW wise old 10 years said "oh mom, I have had LOTS of Christmas's and I know we do not have any money, so please use any money you can get for the *little* kids to get presents...they deserve it" AND yes Dang I was proud and yet I cried for his grace and maturity and for HIS loss of his childhood. Everyone said "Oh your kids will grow and be better for it" and yes they have :0( but MAN what A LOSER I felt.....but truthfully I am so proud of them all now....I am and YOU will be as YOU are now....We are blessed....and loved ....

Always here.....
always
Lori fellow Junebug mom

Jess.....

DO not ever under estimate the quality and wonder of Simple....my four kids knew it first hand and at one time *I* felt like I was such a lacking mom....and yet as they grow and mature, Kyke is 20!!!! oh DEAR 20 :) AND doing so so well. I remember him being 10 and his dad left he and the three other kids and me and it was our first Christmas and him in HOW wise old 10 years said "oh mom, I have had LOTS of Christmas's and I know we do not have any money, so please use any money you can get for the *little* kids to get presents...they deserve it" AND yes Dang I was proud and yet I cried for his grace and maturity and for HIS loss of his childhood. Everyone said "Oh your kids will grow and be better for it" and yes they have :0( but MAN what A LOSER I felt.....but truthfully I am so proud of them all now....I am and YOU will be as YOU are now....We are blessed....and loved ....

Always here.....
always
Lori fellow Junebug mom

I want to encourage you to not feel badly because of crafts or whatever. I'm so inspired by you, Jess -- whether it's how joyfully you play with your kids or your awesome photos like that one above. I think you are so brave and so strong and so connected to your family. Let everyone have their competitions or whatever, you are an inspiring and amazing person, and I think that you mother with so much creativity and love.

I will click that BlogHer button when I get paid.
xoxoxo

Oh man. We all suck, don't we? I mean, so I manage to make cookies one day. It doesn't mean the next day they aren't plopped in front of the boob tube while I waste 8 hours online. 8 hours. 8 whole hours. Doing nothing but ignoring my children. And then I go to bed and cry about it.

One thing blogging has taught me is that NONE of us have it all together. Even if it looks like we do. We don't.

What we don't hear about in the same blogs that make us feel so inadequate is the hours spent ignoring the kids or all the mistakes that were made while creation that one amazing craft. All the stuff I've made looks pretty rubbish when I look at those crafty blogs but the best thing I ever made (my son) is healthy, happy & learning more every day, I don't care if it takes me 2 weeks to make a single card, I can make stuff for the rest of my life kids on the other hand change & grow daily & you can never re-do that day you wasted crafting instead of spending time with your kids.

"It is such a simple life. But, today, i am very happy for it."

That's it right there.

For everyone you look at and feel insufficient, five are looking at you and wanting to be you in return.

I look at your gorgeous photos and I'm inspired to take more and better pictures of my kids. I read that you lay down with Parker at night for him to go to sleep and I want to lay down with my kids instead of shuffling them here and there. When asked to be President of Alex's school next year I wanted to curl up and suck my thumb, but I remembered that you have four kids and you're the president of your kids school and you do it well. So you inspired me to do that too.

I feel the same way some times. but then i try to remember that it isn't one person who is doing all these amazing and intimidating things ... it's dozens of people doing one tiny amazing thing but it all blurs together in my head until i feel like I should have the nice house AND the nice meals AND the nice clothes AND the Q.T. AND the beautiful crafts. nobody has all of them.

and nobody takes pictures of the crafts that didn't work or the brownies that got burned or the souffle that tasted like earwax. or the kids lined up in front of the TV. Or unrolling the toilet paper while you're surfing the internet. or worse.

anyway. whenever I come here I am reminded of how much other people (read: you) are able to accomplish in a day. so don't knock yourself, woman. i could never keep up.

But you do bake so well!!! Remember the lemon poppy seed cake!!!

Good to know you are doing better.

Luciana

I think we tend to forget that our children don't often have the expectations we think they might have...your children love YOU, and I wouldn't imagine that they compare you to other people.
As for a simple life: you would be shocked at how under-programmed and quiet life is in my house, and it's always been that way.
If you are happy with things as they are then you have won a small victory.

and nobody takes pictures of the crafts that didn't work or the brownies that got burned or the souffle that tasted like earwax. or the kids lined up in front of the TV. Or unrolling the toilet paper while you're surfing the internet. or worse.

That's why I started the Honest Photography Group, so we could actually see some of that stuff. It's very therapeutic.

http://www.flickr.com/groups/honestphotography/

Wow, your post couldn't have come at a better time. Why do some moms act as if it's a contest, with the manic volunteering/perfect home/kids/car/spouse seemingly so important...why do I fall into that trap, sometimes, too? I wish we could all stop being so hard on ourselves and on other moms. We're all doing our best, or trying to get there. And here's a big AMEN to simple.

and its a beautiful life ... beautifully told.

;)

It's hard when everyone else looks so perfect, isn't it? I feel the same, even without children.

I know what you mean. When I try to do anything crafty etc. I either get it wrong or my DD "helps" me to the detriment of whatever I am working on. However, we all do the best we can. When I blow up at the kids or want to lock myself in the bathroom to pee by myself, I look at other blogs and realize that I am not the only one who isn't a perfect mom.

Oh my god, I NEVER, ever do crafts with my kids. I am way too much of a control freak to let them make a mess. I feel like saying "no honey, don't you want to use the BLUE crayon? That would look so much better, don't you think?", instead of just letting them create it themselves. And don't even get me STARTED on the evils of Play-Doh.

I'm so glad to hear that you got out with your kids and went to a place like a mall, and didn't freak out. Toy stores, especially, can be so overwhelming and stressful. Go, you!

Hello Jess. Just de-lurking to say hello. I am so often overwhelmed by your experiences and wish that I could find more words of support and understanding. I have to say that I really believe kids don't need overprogramming and stimulation. My daughter (yes, just one and some days...well, let's just say I cannot imagine 4!) spent the best day chasing snakes and frogs with other neighbourhood kids, no interference, prgramming or planning by any adults needed and she looked delightfully disheveled the entire time!

Less is more. I believe this to be true for most things. We decluttered our lives this year. Reduced the toys and scheduling. Last night the kids played with sticks and sand in the yard. Ignoring everything else. Their biggest joy these days- going for a walk with the dog. No batteries, home baked treats, structured art classes included. I think the most important thing I am doing for them right now is reading to them and hugging them.

Babe..come read my blog...no craftiness or perfection there....faaaaar from it...

don't compare.

be.

I know you don't mean to, but you totally made me laugh. Hon, you have FOUR kids, and you do SO much for them. Harry Potter theme birthday parties? Camping up in the mountains in a snowy cabin? Spending as much time as you do at the school making it as awesome for them AND their peers as you can? Are you kidding me? We all do what we can, sometimes it's more sometimes it's less.

And, what's more, I feel exactly the same way. That I really don't do enough of just being a mom and hanging out.

I wouldn't worry too much. My crafts always come out revoltingly bad. They never look like the pictures in the magazines and it always kills me because then I just end up throwing them out and then I'm even more mad because then it was a complete waste of time, as well as a flop. I hope I made you feel better. You're not alone in the bad crafts department.