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March 21, 2007

entertaining any doubt

Fucking hell.

I am in hell.

Will someone please just come and kiss me on the forehead and tell me they like me just the way i am.

I am so tired. I am tired of the "i don't like it when you..."

"The problem with you is..."

"What you need to change is..."

"You're biggest problem is..."

Shane, being the optimist, keeps calling me encouragingly and telling me this is the best week of my life.

I have four beautiful children who are well liked, socially adept, loved. Teachers tell me they can see it. It's my greatest accomplishment. Yet, i get no acknowledgement.

I have suddenly become "the crazy one." I don't like it.

It is not the best week of my life. Possibly the worst.

I am trudging through. Two more doctor appointments to go.

I think i can. I think i can.

Posted by Jess at 10:54 PM Permalink

Comments (17)

Flippy

Sorry it sucks, but I'm glad you're still here to go through it. See, there's always a silver lining.

By the way, if the kids' teachers say they can see that the kids are doing well, isn't that acknowledgement? They're probably one of the best sources of acknowledgement in how the kids are doing since they spend so much time with them.

Posted by Flippy | March 22, 2007 03:17 AM

denise

hugs jess

Posted by denise | March 22, 2007 05:25 AM

Suebob

I am so with you. I HATE criticism. I really try not to criticize others and to be positive, but it seems that few want to return that favor.

Posted by Suebob | March 22, 2007 06:00 AM

lelly

you can, jess. and you WILL!

Posted by lelly | March 22, 2007 06:17 AM

mamatulip

You can.

Posted by mamatulip | March 22, 2007 06:52 AM

melissaS

I'm glad this is possibly the worst week of your life.

Instead of trudging through, you're on your way to living. Fully.

Posted by melissaS | March 22, 2007 06:53 AM

Chantal

I like you the way you are.

Posted by Chantal | March 22, 2007 06:59 AM

Chair

*smooch*

I love you as you are.

Posted by Chair | March 22, 2007 09:06 AM

Chair

Afterthought:
If this truly is the worst week of your life, is it not good that you're here to live it? Can't it only get better from here?

Posted by Chair | March 22, 2007 09:09 AM

Woman with Kids

You can. You will.

Posted by Woman with Kids | March 22, 2007 09:52 AM

Tricia

You Can, You Can, You Will.

Posted by Tricia | March 22, 2007 10:18 AM

kerflop

*smooch* I not only like you how you are, I love who you are. You'll make it through. You will.

Posted by kerflop | March 22, 2007 10:28 AM

ade

You bet you can. Jess I am so proud of you!

Posted by ade | March 22, 2007 10:58 AM

Your kids are so wonderful. I think you are doing a great job! You always seem to this reader to be able get it together to get them out for adventures and for the more mundane, way more than most moms I know, even when you are feeling like hell. It's impressive.

Also impressive is your fight in this battle. Like the others, I know you can lick it and I wish you the best!

Posted by LB | March 22, 2007 04:50 PM

Miss S

MMMMMWah!
I like you just the way you are ...

One. breath. at. a. time ... :)

Sometimes it is okay to be just a little crazy. I mean, otherwise? The world would suck.

Posted by Miss S | March 22, 2007 09:13 PM

jenB

HA! My first inclination was to say. You can get better and you will.

I called a couple of times, not sure if you are full time at the hospital or home.

Mucho Love

Posted by jenB | March 22, 2007 11:58 PM