« good morning miami | Main | thanks for the fun »

October 15, 2006

excess

Today is my birthday. I am happy to have reached this birthday. I am happy to have gone through so much mental torment this year. It has made me realize how hard this life is. How many beautiful things there are. How much i adore my family. Every cute and smelly inch of them.

I am not all better. I don't want to be portraying that here. One day, everything is all better. It doesn't work that way. The other night i had a small breakdown by the pool. I heaved the most massive tears i have ever cried. I moaned and tears flowed. Shane held me.It was the first time i have cried since this whole thing started. It was horrible.

I am seperated from my sadness here in miami. I have left it behind me for now. I am ignoring it while i enjoy this beautiful place with my husband.

Today we are going on a swamp tour in honour of my birthday. I'm totally psyched.

Posted by Jess at 06:46 AM Permalink

Comments (20)

blackbird

I wish so much for you.

Posted by blackbird | October 15, 2006 07:40 AM

Happy Birthday!!!

Posted by LB | October 15, 2006 10:41 AM

Elizabeth

Miami is beautiful, look at that sky and that water!

Happy Birthday, Jess. I hope you find your way out of the sadness this year. You deserve all the happiness the world has to offer.

Posted by Elizabeth | October 15, 2006 10:47 AM

Tracy

Happy Birthday!!!

Posted by Tracy | October 15, 2006 11:12 AM

Refinnej

Happy birthday, from a fellow Libran.

I hope you're having a beautiful day!

Posted by Refinnej | October 15, 2006 02:10 PM

Dana

Happy Birthday, Jess! -hugs galore- I hope you are enjoying your trip and the warm weather!

Posted by Dana | October 15, 2006 02:29 PM

starrynite

Happy birthday. It is a gradual process, but things will continue to get better. We will always continue to have "off" days because we are human. But there is definitely a place that is "better" if not "cured".

I wish every happiness to you and your family and pray that this year will be wonderful for you in every way xXx

Posted by starrynite | October 15, 2006 03:37 PM

Stacey

Happy Birthday Jess! What a great place to have your birthday! Hope you have a great time in Miami and that the weather's perfect while you're there.

Posted by Stacey | October 15, 2006 03:38 PM

Suebob

Jess - it's snackishblog{at}yahoo.com. Send me your snailmail and I will get some in the mail - is there anyone you want besides you? I am out of some but will do my best.

Posted by Suebob | October 15, 2006 04:49 PM

Renee

Happy, happy birthday! I'm exactly 13 days behind you (and one year). Have a great one.

Posted by Renee | October 15, 2006 05:23 PM

jennster

happy birthday beautiful. may this year bring you peace and comfort and beautiful things. SMOOCH!

Posted by jennster | October 15, 2006 08:42 PM

Chair

You're one day older than Theya! Happy Birthday, babe. It's good to cry, though, sometimes, isn't it? To let it out?

Posted by Chair | October 15, 2006 09:33 PM

Jen

Happy Birthday, BeauTeeFul!!

Posted by Jen | October 15, 2006 09:46 PM

Ada

Happy Birthday!
I owe you a cupcake with sprinkles and a cherry.

Posted by Ada | October 16, 2006 12:04 AM

wordgirl

Changing the scenery helps, but it's a temporary thing. You can only be "all better" if you can be in your own space and feel okay. Hope it happens for you.

Posted by wordgirl | October 16, 2006 08:03 AM

Yay! I'm so glad you're enjoying Florida. I love it here.

Hope you had a wonderful birthday and that you got to see some gators on the swamp tour :o)

Posted by TB | October 16, 2006 08:05 AM

debbie

happy happy birthday, jess. enjoy it, dammit! xo!

Posted by debbie | October 16, 2006 08:38 AM

lori

Happy belated birthday, Jess!

I know you're still working on being in the place you want to be. I'm rootin' for ya!

Posted by lori | October 16, 2006 11:57 AM

Yayagirl