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September 04, 2006

new beginnings

Tomorrow morning eliza starts kindergarten.

I have spent most of this long weekend at the school preparing emergency notices, laminating pictures of her, scrubbing every surface with bleach. Making sure that the school is safe for my little girl.

All i can tell you is that life-threatening allergies suck. They suck the life out of you. Worrying every moment. Holding your baby close. Sniffing the breath and food of every child around you to make sure that they are not going to kill your child. Your baby.

We have lived with these allergies for four years. But, i have never left eliza's side. Never a playdate or a party that i wasn't there. To make sure. And now she is leaving me.

Posted by Jess at 11:06 PM Permalink

Comments (17)

mamatulip

Oh Jess...I can imagine the mix of emotions you must be feeling today.

I'm thinking of you. And of Eliza.

Posted by mamatulip | September 5, 2006 06:24 AM

Andrea

I have my fingers crossed that everything goes well for her (and for you).

Posted by Andrea | September 5, 2006 06:45 AM

supa

Oh. Man. A big day indeed. Good luck to her and to you.

Posted by supa | September 5, 2006 07:26 AM

Jen

Thinking about you.

Posted by Jen | September 5, 2006 08:29 AM

marian

You've got a lot of courage, Jess. And so does Eliza. I'll be thinking of you both. Just keep breathing and try not to let the anxiety run away with you. All will be well.

Posted by marian | September 5, 2006 08:33 AM

blackbird

Such a hard thing.
Another day of putting your trust in the universe...as we all do, for our own reasons, on the first day of school each year.

I'll be thinking of you.

Posted by blackbird | September 5, 2006 10:01 AM

mothergoosemouse

Oh, so scary. Starting school is nerve-wracking enough without allergies to up the ante immeasurably.

She'll do wonderfully. I'm glad the school is prepared.

Posted by mothergoosemouse | September 5, 2006 10:30 AM

Mocha

Oh, Jess. Will you never tire of me telling you how much I adore you? I so do. You write such beautifully simple yet loaded posts.

Is "she'll be fine" too trite?

How about "you'll be fine."?

Posted by Mocha | September 5, 2006 01:56 PM

sweetney

so sorry you're having to deal with so much. but you've done all you can -- it will be okay.

good luck, to both of you!

Posted by sweetney | September 5, 2006 03:19 PM

Chantal

Big indeed. I pray this year is full of fantastic experiences for her. You're a fantastic mother and so involved in her school. You are the most amazing advocate for her.

Posted by Chantal | September 5, 2006 05:04 PM

Chantal

Big indeed. I pray this year is full of fantastic experiences for her. You're a fantastic mother and so involved in her school. You are the most amazing advocate for her.

Posted by Chantal | September 5, 2006 05:11 PM

Chantal

Big indeed. I pray this year is full of fantastic experiences for her. You're a fantastic mother and so involved in her school. You are the most amazing advocate for her.

Posted by Chantal | September 5, 2006 05:14 PM

Belinda

Oh, Jess...I am feeling for you SO much right now. I would be beside myself. You are strong, and you've done everything you can. All I can add is just don't be afraid of being seen as the "crazy allergy-paranoid mommy" of that darling girl. Make as much noise as you can, so it will resonate in their brains EVERY DAY. My prayers with you, Love.

Posted by Belinda | September 5, 2006 07:15 PM

katie

Allergies are so scary (my husband is allergic to so ver many things). Good luck, I am sure she will do well considering how hands-on you are being.

Posted by katie | September 5, 2006 08:44 PM

katie

Allergies are so scary (my husband is allergic to so ver many things). Good luck, I am sure she will do well considering how hands-on you are being.

Posted by katie | September 5, 2006 08:44 PM

katie

Allergies are so scary (my husband is allergic to so ver many things). Good luck, I am sure she will do well considering how hands-on you are being.

Posted by katie | September 5, 2006 08:46 PM

Allison

Coming out of lurking to say I understand. We deal with peanut, soy, egg, dairy and wheat allergies for my little girl. The world can seem very scary. I pray all went well.

Posted by Allison | September 6, 2006 07:06 PM