Despite my past complaints about attachment parenting i am dreading the end to my little family bed. There was a period of time when we had two queen sized mattresses on our bedroom floor with five of us sharing - that was a little too much for my claustrophobic tendencies. But, now that we are down to a normal bed with our last little baby sleeping between us i am in co-sleeping bliss.
I have been lucky with bedtimes because as the (formerly) nursing mother i had the baby all to myself. Shane put the other kids to bed. Somehow i have held on to this routine. Now that parker is in that funky needing a nap, but not really needing a nap stage, on the days he does nap it can take an hour or more after stories for him to fall asleep. On nights when i have a meeting i freely let him nap his heart out during the day because i know i won't have to deal with the extra long routine.
Mostly though, we climb into bed, read a few books and i sing him a few songs while tickling his back and he drifts quickly and sweetly into sleep. I often lay with him a few extra minutes just to breathe in his still sweet toddler breath and study his little face, trying desperately to hold onto all the little toddler nuances. The still turned up nose, the chubby cheeks, the open-mouth breathing. Last children are so bittersweet. Although i would like to have time alone in bed with shane, i find myself discouraging the big boy bed we bought parker at christmas that sits unused beside ours.
Often, in the moments between wakefulness and sleep parker and i whisper sweet nothings to each other. I kiss him and tell him how much i love him. That he is my baby. He always answers the same:
"But mom, i'm a little big boy."
"yes you are. but you're my baby too."
"i love me mom."
"i love you too."
This year parker has spent many afternoons playing with older boys. He's even had a few over for "playdates." Tonight as i was putting him to bed he told me he wanted to have a sleepover with roman, his favourite eleven year old.
"but where will you sleep?"
"i'll sleep with his mom and dad."
I don't ever want this to end. This parenting babies and toddlers and preschoolers too. All of it. It goes by so fast.
Posted by Jess at 09:39 PM Permalink
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Oh he sounds just like my little Peter. Peter is now five and still begs to go to bed with me. He cuddles and kisses me all over. He's just the sweetest baby and he too is my last! :(
Posted by mrs darling | August 8, 2006 10:04 PM