part 1: seattle

Sitting in the seattle airport right now, waiting for my alaska airlines flight and hoping that my bag makes it through the flight change.

Airports are freaky. I'm feeling very country. Plus, all the restaurants and bars? Do we really need 17 choices of fast crap food whilst waiting to sit on a cramped plane and burp our ugly food in the airspace of, well, me?

I'm sorry but america is different from canada. Just a little bit, in some subtle way. I feel like the smiling leper. I asked some people as we were going through customs and security a question and they ignored me. Literally. Looked at me, listened to my question, and looked away and continued talking to each other.

And also, security and customs? That's some scary shit.

Going through US customs:

"why are you going to the hyatt?

"um, a conference."

"what kind of conference?"

"um, writing....internet stuff."

"do you speak american or gibberish?"

"actually, i speak english."

"what do you do for a living"

"i'm a mom."

"why are you going to the hyatt?"

"um, i'm a writer, i guess..."

"just go."

Posted by Jess at 04:06 PM Permalink

Comments (6)

Ada

crazy.
however, be glad your name is so benign. the customs woman when we went to san fran knew i wasn't swedish...

Posted by Ada | July 26, 2006 09:09 PM

Lin

Would if make you feel better if I told you immigration/customs in Vancouver kept us for over an hour with a bunch of crazy questions that always returned to..."Will you be taking a job from a Canadian?" Dumbest answer I ever gave anyone was ,"Now how in the hell would I know the answer to that?" Until one week ago when my husband got his Canadian work permit, he has been stopped by the same red-haired immigration agent every time he's flown up there just because he had some stupid wife who had to get all smart alecky!

Immigration/customs suck whichever side of the border you happen to be on. See you at Blogher!

Posted by Lin | July 26, 2006 11:06 PM

Kim

My first trip across the border as an adult was shortly after 9/11. Faced with the US Marine carrying a machine gun, complete with bullet belt-thingy strapped across his shoulders, this Canadian hick almost peed her pants.

Posted by Kim | July 27, 2006 01:16 AM

marian

This is perversely reassuring to me, Jess, since Max is about to move to Canada.

Posted by marian | July 27, 2006 06:19 AM

lori

Gibberish? How insulting that they said that to you!

Last time I went through Customs was on our way to England, before 9/11. I've heard that they're even worse now and that you should in no way smile or even say "Hello" to them. Sounds ridiculous to me that you can't smile at a customs agent. Grumps.

Posted by lori | July 27, 2006 08:08 AM

Dana

I cannot believe that the security/customs person asked if you speak American. I'm actually embarrassed for him. Ummm Duh....what a jerk!

Posted by Dana | July 29, 2006 09:22 AM