all of this is clear to me

Tonight i got a message on my computer that my hard disk was full. When i asked shane he said that it was my photos. When i looked at my iPhoto i had 2843 pictures. So much life.

I spent a couple of hours going through it all. They date back to 1999. Sporadic. But they are there. Pictures of toby as a baby, then eliza and then lots of parker. I switched to all digital around the time parker was born in 2003.

But, my god, the life i have lived in the past nine years. It hurts me to think of how fast it is passing.

When tristan was born i cherished every single moment. Every milky smile. Every newborn stretch. Every ounce gained and inch grown.

And then toby was born, all colicky and complicated. A whirlwind. A whirlwind of babies and pregnancies and births and milestones.

Really. I am humbled by this life as i look at it in photos. I am struck by the beauty of it. I am in awe of all that i have to lose.

Thanks for letting me share it. Really.

Posted by Jess at 09:15 PM Permalink

Comments (9)

Irene

no Jess, thank YOU.

Posted by Irene | June 20, 2006 12:23 AM

jennifer

"I am in awe of all that i have to lose."

that is so beautiful, jess. thank you.

Posted by jennifer | June 20, 2006 06:44 AM

blackbird

The pleasure is mine.

Posted by blackbird | June 20, 2006 07:59 AM

Redneckmommy

Isn't this the truth?

I am a photo whore myself, and I refuse to apologize for it.

And it served me well.

Thanks for sharing pieces of your treasures with us.

Posted by Redneckmommy | June 20, 2006 08:26 AM

Kat

I am 8 weeks into this thing called parenthood and I feel like it is flying by. I can't imagine 9 years! Can you get an external harddrive to back them up so you can free up some space? They are very cheap these days.

Posted by Kat | June 20, 2006 08:55 AM

Jen

we thank you for sharing with us

Posted by Jen | June 20, 2006 10:13 AM

Mocha

Aww, Jess. That was beautiful. I loved that. Now I need to go clean out my harddrive, too. It's so slow when I open iPhoto. Could it be the 5,000+ pics?

Maybe.

Your kids? Gorgeous.

Posted by Mocha | June 20, 2006 01:20 PM

marian

thanks for sharing it with us. you do have a truly beautiful life, vibrant, ALIVE life.

Posted by marian | June 21, 2006 06:54 AM

supa

somehow this post slipped past me. it's beautiful.

you really evoke that certain hazy feeling i get when looking through photo albums -- be they paper or on my hard disk. it's amazing how much things change, and how quickly.

Posted by supa | June 21, 2006 10:14 AM