Why oh why didn't

Why oh why didn't anybody tell me?

As I have said before i have a somewhat morbid curiosity about the whole bikini/Brazilian waxing thing. I have never waxed my girly parts before, but have been dying to try, but always to chicken to follow through.

Anyway, last night while the entire house was sleeping i watched a show (Cathouse - don't judge) that had some detailed and gratuitous examples of some classy ladies and how they shave to achieve all kinds of looks; including, but not limited to the landing pad, totally bald and a personal favourite - the soul patch.

So this morning in the shower i got brave and probably a little carried away and did a little shaving. What i'm upset about is the itch! Oh my fucking god the itch is killing me. How could you not have told me and how the hell do i make it stop. I'm dying here. I walked around the mall with my hands in my pants today before i realized how truly itchy i was and that i was out in public.

I cannot go to school tomorrow with my hands in my pants! How and when will it stop.